Theme of Zoom Meeting: Forgiveness
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updated: 8/23/2020
Questions:
1. What is forgiveness?
2. Is the quick forgiver more likely to be happier than the grudge holder? Why?
3. Under what circumstances might forgiveness flow from your mouth but remain stuck in your heart?
4. Would you admire someone who was quick to forgive anyone who hurt her as long as she was convinced the person was sincerely sorry? Can you be too quick to forgive?
5. Why might it be important to forgive ourselves?
6. Are there some transgressions that you consider unforgivable?
7. When you were a child, were those responsible for your care quick to forgive you? How did their generous or stingy forgiveness affect you?
8. Why might grandparents be more forgiving of their grandchildren than parents are of their children? When grandparents are more forgiving, are they undermining the authority of the parents?
9. If someone finds it impossible to forgive, does that trait do as much harm to the unforgiver as to the unforgiven?
10. Generally, are women more generous in forgiving than are men? Why might that be?
11. What might make a person incapable of forgiving?
12. How can children be taught to be forgiving?
13. Under what circumstances, if any, can you forgive a racist who has turned her hatred against you? Notice I used the pronoun her instead of him. Why do you think I chose her?
14. If Marcia wanted to apology for hurting your feelings, how might she best express her apology? By phone? Personal conversation? Handwritten letter? Text or email?
15. How might unforgiveness fracture the unity of a congregation?
16. Are religious people more forgiving than the irreligious than the atheist?
17. When we take our final breath, would we be happier knowing that we have forgiven all those who have offended us or might we make our final exit happy to carry our grudges with us?
18.Has our discussion on forgiveness in anyway changed your views of forgiveness?
Quotations:
Click on the link at the beginning of the quote to see its origin.
1. ... if you don't practice forgiveness, you might be the one who pays most dearly. By embracing forgiveness, you can also embrace peace, hope, gratitude and joy. -- Mayo Clinic
2. Forgiveness can lead to: Healthier relationship; less anxiety, stress and hostility; lower blood pressure; fewer symptoms of depression; a stronger immune system; a stronger immune system; improved hearth health; improved self-esteem. -- As above, also from the Mayo Clinic
3. Whether its a simple spat with your spouse or long-held resentment toward a family member or friend, unresolved conflict can go deeper than you may realizeit may be affecting your physical health. -- John Hopkins Medicine Center
4. Always forgive your enemies nothing annoys them so much.-- Oscar Wilde
5. Most of us can forgive and forget; we just don't want the other person to forget that we forgave. --Ivern Ball
6. Not forgiving is like drinking rat poison and then waiting for the rat to die.--Anne Lamott
7. The stupid neither forgive nor forget; the naive forgive and forget; the wise forgive but do not forget. Thomas Szasz
8. I think the first step is to understand that forgiveness does not exonerate the perpetrator. Forgiveness liberates the victim. Its a gift you give yourself. T. D. Jakes
9. How unhappy is he who cannot forgive himself. Publilius Syrus
10. Forgiveness should start now. Putting off forgiving only deepens the wound. Clinging to bitterness postpones happiness. Life is short, time is fleeting. Today is the day to forgive. Wilfred Peterson
11. The easy job is to forgive others. The tough job is to forgive yourself. REG